26 weeks! That’s half a year! (26x2=52…52 weeks in a year, always show your working).
If you have been with me every week or if you have read an odd episode here and there or if this is your first time here (come on in! The water’s ever so warm), then really Thank You So Much For Reading (TYSMFR).
I see people write that sort of thing all the time and I’ve never really taken it seriously but I now understand that the feeling behind it is nothing more complicated than deep and genuine gratitude. If you have ever messaged me to tell me you like this thing or told me in real life or consistently made it the focus of a whatsapp group chat every Sunday morning for the last six months, I am very honoured and very grateful.
But enough about me, HOW THE HELL ARE YOU?
Oh right. Go on. How interesting. I didn’t see that coming for you but now I’ve heard it, honestly? It fits.
If I’m completely honest with you (and why the hell wouldn’t I be at this stage?), I’m feeling more than a little battered by the festive season which this end has been besieged by illness in various levels of seriousness and bad news.
But December is done now, Baby Jesus is back in his box and the bulbs I planted in the Autumn are beginning to sprout out of various containers in my courtyard. My partner says this is alarming and a clear result of the climate crisis that is simply pounding at our doors as we continue to turn our tellys up louder. I however, am a very measured and unalarmist person and a quick google told me that it’s OK for bulbs to start poking their sweet green heads through the soil in January. So sound the trumpets and swing a hanky round your head, Spring is on the way! What a joyful thought. January is long BUT REMEMBER February is short and then HELLO MARCH, we’re basically there.
Here’s what’s been rocking my boat and floating my socks this week:
This Album
Doechii’s Alligator Bites Never Heal came out in August but I have just been introduced to it by my dear dear friend who has impeccable taste in music. She said “maybe you will like this Hels”. INCORRECT I LOVE IT.
It’s rare for me to listen to something and immediately fall for it, usually I need a few go’s but with this I was 100% onboard immediately. I found the whole thing so good that I was really quite startled.
Doechii is clearly the coolest, funniest, smartest person of all time. Listen to the whole album, or start with Denial is A River or watch her tiny desk concert.
Hot Chocolate
Swerve!
These past few weeks I’ve been craving Hot Chocolate. It’s so comforting and cosy and nostalgic. Having said that, my main experience of drinking Hot Choc as a child was one of disappointment. It was never, ever chocolatey enough. It always either tasted like sweet hot milk or even worse, sweet hot watery milk.
Having said that, there was a brief spell in my very early teenage years (10/11/12- who can remember the specifics?) when my Dad got into golf. This meant on a Monday evening (when we were his responsibility), instead of taking us to Borders (where I would be allowed a entire slice of Starbucks chocolate cake and a book if I could justify why I wanted it), he took my sister and I to a driving range. This was, of course, BORING. However, there was a hot drinks vending machine there and you could buy a Hot Chocolate for 25p. Those ranges were cold and I loved getting that watery sweet synthetic drink every week to warm me up. It almost made for the loss of the cake and the book (to think I used to read a new book every week- I really must get round to burning my phone).
When I was old enough to make my own Chocolat Chaud, I’d go crazy with the stuff. Cadbury’s Drinking Chocolate recommends three heaped teaspoons per mug. You know I was throwing six in there. Recently I tried some Cadburys and holy shit that stuff is sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet (as in the opposite of savoury, not as in “wicked cool”).
I have now perfected how I like to make my own Hot Chocolate which I will detail below. Please understand, I know you know how to make Hot chocolate. This is just the way I like it and I just made myself a mug and it really is good. Not too sweet, just rich enough.
Hot Chocolate (Hels’ Version)
You will need:
Your favourite on the smaller side mug
The amount of milk it takes to fill this mug
Two heaped teaspoons of coco powder (not drinking chocolate)
Two heaped teaspoons sugar
Two squares of your favourite dark chocolate
Splash of cream (entirely optional and only if you have some in the fridge already. I did today which is why it’s made the cut)
You must:
Add a splash of milk to a small saucepan on a low heat.
Add the coco powder and sugar- stir until you have a paste with no lumps.
Add the rest of the milk and your squares of chocolate
Heat, stirring with a whisk until it’s just too hot to touch and the choc has melted.
Add the cream (if using)
Optional: go a bit nuts with the whisk at the end to make everything nice and frothy.
Drink from your favourite mug.
Things to note:
The small mug is not because I am being conservative (God forbid) or stingy, it’s because this is rich and if you have too much you’ll feel sick (take it from someone who’s had too much and felt sick).
You can use any milk. Hazelnut is my absolute favourite, followed by whole cow’s milk followed by oat milk, followed by almond milk but really any milk will work.
You could use milk chocolate but then probably cut some or all of the sugar.
Obviously you can add booze if you’re feeling cheeky or you’re a LEGEND. If you are prone to making margaritas at home then you will have cointreau or triple sec which are very good here. Bourbon good, whisky good, vodka and gin bad, obviously.
Other things that have been good this week
The sun finally came back yesterday and the light was beautiful as I walked around the park. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times- cold day, bright sun, tick tick tick.
My partner bought some sardines from a fish market today and we had them with scrambled eggs on toast and it was both delicious and made me feel like it was World War Two. Highly recommend. Only 50p a fillet!
The Split Barcelona on iplayer. I love The Split. It’s an ideal mix of frothy, sexy, undemanding and incredibly well acted (we prostrate ourselves at the alter of Nicola Walker). This two part special was everything I wanted it to be.
The announcement that Patti Lupone is going to be in the new season of And Just Like That. A phenomenal combination.
Other things that have not been good this week
The fact that this is a Hot or Not list but I refuse (for reasons unknown to myself) to name it as such.
So much Wicked Press Tour content continues to be released? I want to see Wicked again but I’m at risk of becoming oversaturated.
I am going through a “losing everything” spell. Every six months or so, one of these comes around and I found myself without a handful of precious and/or expensive possessions. I’m talking jewellery, headphones, cards- you know the stuff. I have been prone to losing things since being a child and I think this might just be a cross I have to bear. If you have any tips to help me change, please tell me. I love to learn and grow.
Not being able to see enough of my friends because everyone has dispersed to family homes for The Season. Will rectify starting MONDAY.
See Ya
We come, once more to the bottom of the page and this time I must make an announcement.
(I wait to see if I have your full attention and continue in a most serious tone).
Although I will do my very best (love my God, serve my Queen and country) to continue to post weekly, I’m sort of choc-o-block at the moment and it looks like it’s only going to get more choc and more block. As a result it’s unlikely over the next few months that I’ll have enough to say at the end of the week (I often feel like I’m pulling stuff out of my arse as it is- another little peep behind the curtain there for you, except this time the curtain was my butthole).
Also I have to write a play (If I put that here I might get on with it?).
Also I start a new job on Monday. I am scared. Wish me luck.
Either way, scheduled programming may be interrupted but I’ll be back at some point soon. Although it may not be with such military precision (no one is as shocked as me that I’ve kept it up this long).
Before I go, let’s look and marvel at this by dear old Vincent. For some reason it’s made me want to weep*
*The reason is that I recently read this brilliant peice in The Marginalian about Van Gough and Gauguin’s disastrous attempt at being room mates and it’s deeply tragic and moving and I keep thinking about Vincent’s ear again.
Go well my lambs. Whatever you do this week will be more than enough. This life, chaotic and cruel as it is, is brighter, more stable and more loving because of you.
I, for one, adore ya.
See you soon.
CBBBS (cheerio but be back soon) x
Good luck for job & play!!!!